We’ve all heard it lately; “I’m living my best life” from musicians like Cardi B rapping about it to memes all over the internet. But what exactly does that mean and how do you do it?
There’s no concrete answer to this, and it will vary depending on who you ask. To me, living your best life means living your life on your terms. That said, there are so many variables that go into living your life on your terms that it can still feel overwhelming, especially if you feel like your life is totally out of your control.
So what do you do?
Be Authentic
On the surface, we all think we’re authentic. But if we dig deeper, are we? Being authentic to who YOU are is harder than we think. The truth is we care what people think about us, and that means that sometimes, some of us have pretenses about the way we live our lives because we don’t want to “let anyone down”, or “are afraid what they might say”.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that people will talk about you no matter what you do. So to live your life for the benefit of others, doesn’t make sense (to me). So, live it on your terms. Make decisions that make you happy. Choose things that you will love, 5, 10, 15 years from now. Live it with no regrets.
The fact of the matter is that life is an accumulation of choices. We don’t wake up miserable all of a sudden with where we are in life. It accumulates slowly, with every choice, every day. The best way to have a future that you want, is to make choices that you’ll be happy with today and tomorrow.
Have Fun!
In the midst of all of those choices you’re busy making, don’t get so caught up with them that you forget to actually enjoy life and live it. This is where balance comes in.
I remember the advice of my CPA (he’s also my uncle), when I had to first start getting my taxes done by an accountant for my business. He told me to never forget the moments and the successes. He told me that this moment in my life of starting my first business would never come again. That each of the moments, successes, wins, and loses are all so precious. He told me to revel in each of those moments along the way to really have a fulfilled life.
To this day, that’s one of the best pieces of business advice that I’ve ever gotten. That balance has allowed me to feel ok to take a day off every once in a while and to really appreciate all that I’ve worked for. The last thing I want to happen is I wake up 40 years from now, successful and no memories of my life other than work.
Me. Living In The Moment.
Live Your Dream
What do you want to do? Seriously, if you could do anything, what would it be? Now ask yourself, “why aren’t you doing it?” Seriously?
I’m not saying to quit your job to join the circus, but I am saying go learn some magic tricks if your dream was to join the circus. Find a way to get fulfillment in the area of your passions or your dreams. It doesn’t have to be at a rock star level; sometimes just putting energy in the thing you love is enough to give you the sense of purpose that you feel is missing.
Take the cooking class. Save up for the trip. Buy the ballet slippers and register for the class. There’s absolutely no reason why you can’t at least try to be fulfilled by doing some small act of the thing you love.
It’s important to note that you cannot live in fear and live your best life. Especially as it relates to living your dreams. You might fail. But not trying is literally worse.
Quote from the founder of Class Pass.
What If You Don’t Have A Dream Or Passion?
Try something new. Anything. You might like it. After all, at some point in your life everything was new to you and you had to try things to have an opinion on what you liked, loved and hated. So why is now any different? Try something. You might hate it, but you might love it!
Some of the best memories I have are from trying something new-especially if I was able to try something new with people I like. I still laugh until I cry at some of the memories I’ve made all from trying something new.
This is also a really amazing way to learn new things about yourself. You could have talents you didn’t even know you had, but how will you ever know if you don’t make yourself vulnerable enough to live your life.
It’s Ok To Say No
This is a tough one-especially for women. No. See, just say it 🙂 Our yes’s, when we don’t want to do something, is the quickest way to go down a path that can sometimes be extremely difficult to get off of. Remember, life is about choices. Don’t choose to do something you don’t want to do.
I’m not saying to never help your friends and family and to be a heartless human being. I am saying to put you first. There is a difference. Someone once gave me the advice that helping someone, shouldn’t hurt me. That is the approach to giving your yes’s out. Will it harm you in the long run or be to your detriment? Will you sacrifice your joy? A half hearted no, isn’t the way you want to help those around you anyway. Instead, help them how you can. Teach them how to fish.
Be Happy Where You Are
Easier said than done, right.You want more out of life, but if you could just get that promotion, or get that partner, or get the house your life would be perfect. But why can’t it be perfect on the way to obtaining those things? It can be! It takes you to see that and to appreciate what you have while you’re working for what you want.
Trust me, there is someone, somewhere that would take what you are complaining about in a heart beat. Appreciate what you have. If there’s one thing I know, nothing lasts forever. Love it while you have it.
Playing on the UN General Assembly floor with a friend.
I don’t have all of the answers. But I’m happy with my life, and always have been. Just like anything, it’s a skill that can be learned. Sure, it takes time in the beginning to get used to living your life on your terms. But it’s worth it; this isn’t a dress rehearsal. THIS is your 1 life. Live it to the fullest.
P.S. It’s never too late to start either 🙂
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